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A short JK Rowling spot gives way to some bedtime nightmare scenes, calmed by salvoes of Mary Poppinses, descending from the heavens under their umbrellas. Kids are being tucked into glowing beds. Mr Oldfield is still playing. The central vast image was briefly a baby just now. Truly surreal.

From Mike Oldfield to conductor Simon Rattle, and the London Symphony Orchestra, to play music from the classic, Vangelis-themed Chariots of Fire. The film tells of a Jewish sprinter’s struggle to overcome anti-Semitism, set around the 1924 Paris Games. It has just been re-released in British cinemas as an adaptation comes to the stage.

This photo released by the Gielgud Theatre, London on Thursday July 12, shows Jack Lowden as Eric Liddell, left, and James McArdle as Harold Abrahams in the Gielgud Theatre production of Chariots of Fire. (photo credit: AP/Hugo Glendenning, Gielgud Theatre)
This photo released by the Gielgud Theatre, London on Thursday July 12, shows Jack Lowden as Eric Liddell, left, and James McArdle as Harold Abrahams in the Gielgud Theatre production of Chariots of Fire. (photo credit: AP/Hugo Glendenning, Gielgud Theatre)

And just when you relax, Danny Boyle gives us Rowan Atkinson, playing with the Orchestra one-fingered while pfaffing with his iPhone. Beijing 2008, this is not.

Rowan purports to have been the key musician in that section, much to Rattle’s comedic dismay.

Very British film clips now — short scenes with inside jokes like the scene of the weatherman — the unfortunate Michael Fish — who failed to predict a hurricane. 80s music; clips from Fawlty Towers; Blackadder. A section celebrating British soap operas. All of this unfolding at fast pace in what Boyle apparently wants us to feel could be any British home.

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