Existential threat ahoy!

Terrorists take cover: Chuck Norris to visit

Indomitable actor who has counted to infinity, twice, maybe, accepts Israel invite

Ilan Ben Zion, a reporter at the Associated Press, is a former news editor at The Times of Israel. He holds a Masters degree in Diplomacy from Tel Aviv University and an Honors Bachelors degree from the University of Toronto in Near and Middle Eastern Civilizations, Jewish Studies, and English.

Chuck Norris in the movie trailer for Hellbound, filmed in Israel (photo credit: Image capture from YouTube video)
Chuck Norris in the movie trailer for Hellbound, filmed in Israel (photo credit: Image capture from YouTube video)

At the risk of exacerbating the existential threats swirling around Israel, a Likud parliamentarian invited movie star and solo weapon of mass destruction Chuck Norris to visit the Jewish State.

And terrifyingly, Norris accepted.

During a recent trip to the US, MK Danny Danon met with the actor, martial arts master and Israel-supporter and suggested that the man whose strength and indomitability have spawned 200 million exaggerated stories (and there’s another one) come visit. According to Israel Hayom, Norris told Danon that he was currently filming in the US, but that he would be glad to visit as soon as he wraps.

Norris wrote recently that the US needs “a president who will honor the timeless traditional relationship between America and Israel.” In his long film career, Norris made several films involving Israel and produced by Israeli duo Menahem Golan and Yoram Globus.

It was not clear whether the Israel Defense Forces possesses any weapons capable of thwarting a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick, or whether plans exist to protect Tel Aviv from his beard.

According to Norris lore, the actor can cut through a hot knife with butter, stop eating Pringles anytime he wants, slam a revolving door, and win Connect Four in three. He is also the holder of all Guinness World Records. Oh, and he has counted to infinity. Twice.

More pertinently, according to the Chuck Norris Facts website, Chuck Norris is the reason terrorists hide in caves.


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